tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2742948471830590613.post2429486187114321106..comments2023-07-28T02:58:31.504-07:00Comments on Every day issues: Gender issuesRandom blog about every day issueshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08804361722887442287noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2742948471830590613.post-63942975988864428122009-01-26T20:20:00.000-08:002009-01-26T20:20:00.000-08:00Here is my opinion on the matter of gender issues:...Here is my opinion on the matter of gender issues: Let me just say Alex you are my friend and everything and I respect your opinion but I do not agree with a lot of what you say….<BR/><BR/>First I really don't think we live in a pseudo- patriarchal society- first and foremost you mention the term ‘slut’ and ‘hoe’ both of which are typically associated with women- but you only discuss them as double standards whereas I believe that both terms are influenced by patriarchy. Back in the day women were expected to wait until marriage to engage in sex and did not view sex as pleasurable for themselves, therefore I think these terms, ‘slut’, ‘hoe’ and ‘whore’, are derived from these ideas of patriarchy so when a man and/or woman finds a woman who enjoys sex, and enjoys it without any emotional attachment then that woman becomes characterized as a ‘slut’ or ‘hoe’. Basically when women go against what society has deemed what is ‘natural’ for a woman – wanting a relationship, emotional then she is a hoe, whereas men who engage in what is ‘natural’ behaviors for themselves- sexual promiscuity without attachments are deemed ‘players’. <BR/>Secondly, patriarchy exist in simply going out at night when some women dress in certain attire just to attract male attention, and even as you state: “They just let us think we are in control most of the time in order to cater to the male ego” – I think that in itself is a form of patriarchy. Why should any woman have to make a man feel as though he is in control (control/power typically associated with males)? <BR/>Although I respect you and the type of women you like- I think the things you mention- that you like in a woman are too informed by patriarchy – you don’t like women who are aggressive- a characteristic typically associated with men. I just honestly believe that if we changed the ways in which we perceive gender, how we define it, and if both males and females could possess all characteristics without having to be called ‘dykes’, ‘lesbos’ or ‘fags’, not to mention men who say ‘no homo…’ then men would not have to make up stories about sexual conquest, men would not feel threatened by an aggressive woman, and I would like to take it even further and say that gender roles, and definitions impact so many things in our society such as men on the down low which affects AID’s population, as well as music, film, familial relationships etc. I think it would ultimately be beneficial to everyone if we could begin to change the role gender plays in our lives. I think the best way to do this is to start individually, and lead by example. <BR/>Alex- “In addition I believe that girls should have an emotional and profound reason before they partake in sex.” Once again you are my friend, and I respect your opinion but despite your statement that we live in a ‘psuedo-patriarchal’ society your opinions are informed through patriarchy. In the above statement you say girls should have an emotional/profound reason for engaging in sex- and interestingly enough you do not mention men. If this is the case then the double standard still stands, where men are able (through the privilege of being a man) to have sex without sexual attachment while women must be emotionally attached. Consequentially women who do not have sex with an emotional/profound reason are deemed ‘sluts’ or ‘hoes’. Then you go on to state that women shouldn’t put themselves in the position to be called sluts or hoes. I am sorry but that is BS, because a woman doesn’t even have to do anything and a guy can call her hoe, slut and because of the way our society works he will be believed despite the truth. This too perpetuates the double standard- by only stating that women should be careful you too give men the upper hand. <BR/>But I do agree that these double standards/patriarchy is being reinforced through both women and men. <BR/>Alex-“Females are starting to revolutionize the way they think and have also emotionally detached themselves and "played" the guy before they could "play" them.” I do not think that it is necessarily about emotionally detaching ones self- but the simple fact that not every woman, especially those in our age range, are looking for relationships just like not every guy is looking for a relationship. Simply put some women enjoy sex just as much as men, and do not ‘catch feelings’ just like men ‘claim’ they don’t.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com