Friday, September 23, 2011

Dangers of Relationship

I might have discussed this topic before but today I will be going at it from a different angle! What makes a relationship! What makes it last, how do they form, what could go wrong! Usually people develop interest in one another through being around each other and familiarizing yourself with that person! After a while you may be interested in engaging in a relationship.

A relationship is a serious matter! Not only is your life, heart, soul, and mind at stake but your future could be as well! Have you ever wondered why after somebody has a traumatic relationship and breaks up with the person they may either be emotionally unstable or may do irrational things. This is because this person's soul is now intertwined with their partner (soul tie). Once that person decides to break up with you not only are you taking a piece of them with you but they also have a piece you. They may have left stains and wounds in your hearts that will be there for eternity! Jesus in the only ONE that can offer true healing and restoration! People say that time heals wounds but there are plenty of people still suffering from these wounds that are damaging them internally and are having a difficult time overcoming this struggle.

In order to illustrate my first point, take a scenario where a girl has cheated on a guy. He breaks up with her. Now when he engages in a new relationship with another girl he lacks trust while struggling to build a deep connection with his girlfriend. Another scenario is where a woman is in a physically abusive relationship. She terminates the relationship and engages in another one. Now any time she is in a room alone with her new boyfriend she becomes paranoid and hits him or has panic attacks and begins shaking! Insecurity is one of the most self destructive qualities an individual can have when it comes to building a healthy relationship. From experience I know it can inhibit intimacy and cause jealousy which is a big problem in certain cultures. Jealousy is usually accompanied by his brother possessiveness. A man/woman who is jealous is usually possessive! This can destroy a relationship because this person may not trust their partner or think that their companion is too good for them and self sabotage the relationship. Another dimension to this problem is that they may try to control all aspects of your life including mobility (leaving the house to run errands) or apparel amongst many other things! After the breakup this person may potentially become a stalker! All of these spirits: infidelity, abuse, and insecurity can cause serious problems in our personal growth and development as well as future relationships!

People seek relationships for different reasons. Some people may feel alone, others may seek validation, some are looking for love they haven't received from their parents, others are pursuing a relationship in order to fit in with the crowd. For whatever reason people are seeking a sacred bond with the opposite sex (presumably)! This makes sense because God said it is not good that the man should be alone and He created his companion(a woman)! We intrinsically desire to mate or be with someone in a romantic manner because the Lord created man and woman so we can be attracted to one another, this is totally natural! Albeit, who do we engage in a relationship with is the bigger question! People have suffered through custody cases, stalking episodes, and horrible experiences because of jumping into relationships without testing the waters and did not realize they were venturing in perilous terrain! People have acquired psychological, mental, spiritual, and emotional scars after certain relationships!

As children we are innocent and pure, however through the experiences of life our hearts become hardened and we begin to build walls around our hearts that impede formation of strong bonds. The stains left on our hearts definitely affect how we grow and how we become as an adult! Someone who has been through a traumatic break up may need sometime to reflect and see how God can search their heart to heal them before they embark on another soul venture! A relationship is more than just a relationship it is the union of two souls, literally! If God honors the relationship He will reveal it and it will be a fruitful relationship! If you wait on God for the optimal relationship He will sustain it and you will grow to love that person beautifully as the relationship remains healthy! Only the love of Christ can cause a relationship to THRIVE!

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